Its fun, but the ending is still unknown….
Prologue
It is nine in the night, India had just won the T20 match and the entire township is enjoying the team's victory in the T20 worldcup finals. I could hear the crackers burst, people laugh and shout and howl.
Every flat in my apartment had a reason to rejoice. But here I am sitting in my flat watching the award ceremony with tears in my eyes. I walk up to my bedroom to spread my bed and as I watch myself in the mirror, I see my dull eyes and say ‘There’s no point now… You lost something that was at your arm’s reach and now you want it back’.
1
It was roughly 4 years back when I had joined an IT company and was having a tough time coping up with things. Not to mention that I was just out of college and almost all my teammates were experienced in the field.
I had a tough time learning things, and was thrown around to different teams due to my poor performance initially. But soon, things came under control and I knew that I was ruling.
Just 3 months later, I saw a new girl on the floor and got pretty much excited about her. Never spoke to her or even knew her name.
Four years earlier, things could have been different, I was a ‘free bird’ then. But now, I already had a girl (Swapna) in my life and never wanted to ditch her, for she was so beautiful and true to heart.
Fate, I guess had different plans. The girl had actually joined my team and her name was Latha and like me she was also struggling to get things right as she was also a fresher, just out of college. She was made to sit with me so that she could learn things quickly (by this time I had enough confidence to get things right..!! J).
Time passed by, this girl came to become my best friend. We spent time together at office. Had lunch together, chatted more than actually work. Even after office hours, we had our mobiles stuck to our ears till we drop sleeping. We started going for movies, restaurants, etc. Had a lot of fun.
2
Time passed by and I had to make a move in my professional life. I quit the company and was preparing for interviews. Friends told me I was stupid to have quit before getting another job, but I knew what I was doing and all through out the time, Latha was with me, always encouraging me and never letting me feel dejected everytime I failed in an interview. Finally, after a four month struggle, I got a pretty good job. She was the first person to know about it and she said ‘Ram, I knew you could do it! I am really happy for you’.
I had to go to the head office to get some training on the project. I met Latha at her office, she had tears rolling down her eyes. I told her, ‘Don’t be stupid, its just for 2 weeks, and I’LL BE BACK!!!’. Though I sounded so confident, I was feeling a strange pain from inside my heart. I did not take much notice of it and left for the training in two days. I could hear her cry even when I called her to say, I had boarded the train. I spoke to her for a long time before the signal got cut. I felt heavy at heart and felt I was missing something.
Two weeks passed within a flash. When I returned, Latha told me never to go anywhere again and I promised so. But I could not keep up the promise for long, I was sent to a client site within the country. She did not cry this time, she knew that like last time, I would call her daily and make sure that we never missed each other.
I was here initially for just 2 months, but it got extended to 5 months. And we felt the distance between us. Maybe that’s why Latha proposed to me and said ‘…enough is enough, I do not want to miss you anymore. Once you come back, I’ll speak to my parents and we will get married’. Now that was straight. I was surprised as I did not see this coming. I felt happy, but was afraid about what my parents would say.
RECAP OF WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED BEFORE I MET LATHA
I met Swapna when I was in college. We were happy to gether and we were sure that we would get married one day. My parents were completely against it, whereas her parents were comfortable with me and Swapna getting married. All that we waited was for the right time, the time when I could get setteled in life with a good job and handsome salary. When my parents got to know about this relationship, they first did not believe it. Later, they were ready to kick me out of the family, if I wanted Swapna. ‘Well..’, I thought ‘this is what happens in all such relationships.’
I was strong and always was ready to face any problem and so was Swapna. But once I moved out to bangalore, we were getting separated. But, since both our parents knew about this and all the trouble I had gone through, I was determined to marry Swapna no matter what happens. Swapna, showed her dislikes a few times, but even that did not make me change my decision. Everytime we broke up, she used to come back to me with a BIG ‘sorry’.
I met her once before I was sent to my client’s location. Even that time we had a huge quarrel over a small thing and we did not talk. But I knew, she would be back with the same SORRY. By now, I was getting tired of her sorrys. But, I did not have any choice of backing out, since I was so much into it and my parents were also changing their mind and were ready to get me and her married, I was completely out of options.
3
I was back from the client location after 5 months and 12 days. The first person I call up was Latha. I wanted to see how happy she was. She was excited to hear my voice (after only 5 hours of silence, when I was on the flight.. J). We spoke to each other for hours that night and I promised to meet her the very next day.
The next 3 days, I spent with her was to be remembered throughout my life. We went to movies, shopping, luch, dinner. I was so excited that I even bought her a ring and she bought me one in return. On the 3rd day, she again proposed. I still was not sure what I wanted to do. And after all that had happened with Swapna, I was not ready for another relationship and was not in a shape to face my parents either with another relationship. So, I told her the same.
I know she wept for days and weeks together, but she did not show any signs of it. Neither did she stop speaking or going out with me.
4
One year passed and Latha was still with me. She had rejected many marriage proposals that her father had seen for her, not sure if that was because of me. But by now, I had bought a house and was about to move in. This time, my mind started playing tricks with me. I wanted Latha more than anything else and was ready to do anything that she asked for and wanted in life. I never said a NO for anything she wanted me to do.
But, I always had my parents in mind and knew that they are more important, and that I should do what they want me to do. So never expressed anything to her.
I had plans to make Latha meet my parents for the house warming ceremony.
Things went hay-wire with the ceremony and we decided not to invite anyone else and it was only me and my parents conducting and attending the ceremony.
Life took a wild turn once this happened. I got a new job and a very handsome salary. I was planning for a car and was researching on it for a long time. Used to stay late at office as I did not have anything to go back home and do (except speaking to Latha, which I liked). Due to the job change, I had some financial crisis for the first month and also had much pressure at work due to delivery and other things. I had my mind concentrate completely on it during weekdays and weekends was for my friends and Latha.
I got used to this life. I loved staying alone. I loved staying late at office. I loved speaking to Latha at night before bed. I was happy.
Suddenly, after a few months, I was feeling some lonliness and it started killing me like crazy. I started to realize that Latha was moving away from me. She had reduced speaking to me and we have stopped meeting each other, either because she was going home to her parents on weekends or one of their family members was here to meet her. I smelled something fishy. But I never showed any signs of doubt to Latha, except for asking her to speak to me as usual. This happened three time and the fourth time, I felt ‘I’ve had it. I have to take care of this situation first’. And I told her what she wanted to hear from me for the past 3 years. I asked her what I always feared to ask any one all throughout my life, not even Swapna.
I called her one evening and spoke to her as usual and I said ‘Latha, you remember last year you asked me if I can marry you..’. ‘Yes’ came the reply. ‘What would have happened if I would have said a ‘yes’ at that time?’. ‘Don’t even remind me about it Ram. I would have been happier if that would have happened. But now, it’s too late. Sorry. Bye!’ and she cut my call. I was surprised.
First time in my life I wanted something, something which could have changed my life. The same thing which I had been struggling to decide on for the past 3 years, is now no more when I actually want it. I was dejected.
I called her several times after that. Weeks passed, months passed but nope, she was determined. I also came to learn from her that someone whom she knew from childhood had proposed and she had to accept him or else she would have gotten married to some stranger.
It has been a week since we stopped talking to each other. She shouted at me for my kiddishness and scolded me left and right, was a different thing, the main reaon why I am not speaking to her, maybe, is because I do not want to trouble her anymore. I do not want to disturb her anymore with my ‘Please come back to me..’ plea. I know it is impossible, but I want her back.
It surely is true when they say, you start to like something, the more you miss it. Every morning, I wake up after a disturbed sleep, I feel I should call her and speak to her, but I finally don’t. Every night, I keep looking at my mobile until I fall asleep, to see if I get any ‘Good night’ message, but I don’t. I have come to realize, that now I am really alone and lonely. I know now, that I can convience my parents to get me married to Latha. But heck, Latha is no more mine!!!!
5
After the match got over, I fall on the bed thinking, Why didn’t she tell me that this was to come. Why was I so dumb, and took her for granted. How come, I have everything I wanted, and yet I am not happy now.
I have had many infatuations in life and have encountered many one-sided love. But have never felt this bad after breaking up with anyone. Any particular reasons??
Finally I realised, I took everything for granted. I thought, everyone close to my heart will always be there for me. Suddenly, I wake up one day and realise that I have lost a diamond while I was too busy collecting stones.
I will remember this always in my life...
………………………….
To be Concluded
The end of this story will come shortly… after either of us get married or if the ALMIGHTY has something else in mind!!!
Until then, keep guessing along with me....
Final Words:
‘Life never gives you a second chance’
‘They say 'Marriages are made in heaven'. Made or not, I do not know, but one thing is for sure - the one whom you’re going to marry, would have already been decided by The One above. No matter how many crushes you have in your life, no matter how many infatuations you go through and no matter how much you try to get into a relationship with someone, you're going to marry the only one you're destined to. If that 'one' happens to be the one you're already in love with, then you sure are lucky, or else, better luck next time!’’
